Nov. 29, 2019


Isla Rose, also now known as the youngest prankster in the world, had officially turned three today. We are not sure where the time went, but we have loved laughing with her and watching her learn (aka plan pranks) each day.


So the prankster did not become official until the third day in a row that I found Play Doh in my shoes-and it wasn’t the same shoes, either. She legit put it in different shoes, three days in a row. I get dressed in the dark, so you can only imagine what I thought when I felt that unfamiliar squish. Each time I gathered courage to grab whatever it was deep in the dank sole of my favorite ankle boots or tennis shoes or loafers, I took a breath then laughed aloud: Play Doh again.


Another instance is the great Tootsie Roll debacle. Let me set the scene:
I was actually in the small bathroom going the bathroom (gross I know, but parents deal with this crap-literally-all the time), and Isla came in unannounced with a Tootsie Roll. She asked me to open it.

I said, “No. Wait until I am done here.”

She replied with tears-and not just a little whiny-it was those big fat elephant ones accompanied by sobbing. Wailing, A limp body to the floor. So, I broke my rule and gave in. Just this once.

“Here you go tiny, funny, scary, mini-me. Take the candy and shut the door.”

While deep inside I just wanted the peace of my own potty time. After a few minutes I hear a lot of chaos-typical with four kids. But then I hear something different: Leo is yelling. He is gagging. This is not good. He is quite a puker. So I wipe, wash, and run to my son at the other end of the house and he yells, “Stop!”

I am almost in his room and he screams, “Isla pooped on the floor!” I look at him, cowering on his bed, then look at the floor and see it: a baby turd, with what appears to be some weird gooey diahreah trail.

“Oh God. Gross,” I say as more kids begin filing into me-blocking the doorway of his room. “Yuck!” yells Pearl. “Oh God,” says Claire.

I look around at them all stacked behind me Mother Goose style, then up back at Leo on his bed. And suddenly, Isla rolls up with a bright smile on her face. I look at her. Look at Leo. Look back down on the floor.

“Isla? Is that poop?” I ask. She nods, smiling. “I’m sorry,” she says as she giggles, looking at Leo. I tell Pearl to go get me a baby wipe and send Claire for the disinfectent. Then I get down on the ground. I peer at it closely, but without any glasses or contacts on so I have to get closer. UG. Pearl arrives and hands me the wipe. I again breathe in a courage, scoop up the turd, and it’s not soft or warm, but it is hard and has a very similar texture to a Tootsie Roll. Claire arrives with cleaning product. I look at Isla, who has her hands over her mouth. But that smile is massive and it peeks out from beneath her fingers. She knows that I know. She’s laughing hard now.

So what do I do? Place the “turd” in my mouth and begin to chew. The kids go crazy, but Isla is laughing hysterically. I chew slowly, savoring their horrified looks, then show them the wrapper that I had still in my pants pocket from a few minutes prior.


Another time we were watching a movie at the theatre which doesn’t happen often-in fact, Isla has only gone to The Grinch last year because she is in love with him. Seriously. In love. But I took her and Pearl to a movie a few weekends ago and we were watching previews. And you know when the previews end, right before the film starts? It’s actually one of the only quiet moments in the theatre because everyone is still, in anticipation of the opening scene to start. Well, at this point, Isla screamed from the back row, “GOD DAMMIT!” I looked at Pearl. She looked at me. We both slid down into our upholstered seats, faces as red as the cushions. She yelled it again, and I covered her mouth. She began laughing hysterically, and thankfully, at that time, adorable Arctic Dogs appeared on screen.


And even more recently, Isla likes to fib. One common example is that she keeps telling everyone that she will be 4 today and not 3. And what is funny is that a lot of people buy it because she sounds so sure of herself and she speaks so clearly. This child is full of laughter and light, and we are so lucky she is in our lives! Happy birthday, Isla Rose. May the joke never be on you.


*First pic taken by Kaptured By Kassie, fall 2019

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